Sunday, December 7, 2014

Joshua's Healing

 
It was 1975. I had just had my son Joshua. He was so fragile. I was told by the staff at the hospital that he had a membrane issue in his lungs and he needed to be in an incubator immediately. I was confused? He was named by GOD, literally, and now he was ill? I was really confused about the health issue he was experiencing. I trusted the doctors in the hospital. I agreed to let him stay in the incubator. I asked many times if I could hold him. The doctors said "Oh no, he has to be kept alone" in the incubator to heal.
I watched him lay there, all hooked up to monitors and lines going in him and lights burning his little tender skin. He lay naked in the incubator. It was really hard to watch. I continued to trust the doctors. On the 5th day I sat and watched him. He looked more and more frail and unhealthy. I asked to hold him, the doctors said  "Oh no" he is to sick. Then I was sent home from the hospital, My Insurance was not going to pay for my extended stay. Only Joshua's. I went home without my little bundle of joy! I asked if perhaps I could hold him before I left, The doctors said "NO". It was a very hard thing to do to leave him in this huge institution alone and in a small acrylic hot box. I went down to the car and looked back at this huge building. Sirens were blowing, lights flashing as the emergency entrance lit up with another sadness for another family. I drove away in tears.
I was home for two day's. I had visited the hospital every day as they would allow me. I came crying and left crying.
 
On the eight day I got a call from the hospital, saying Joshua was dying. He was not expected to make through the night. I panicked.
I ran to the hospital and said to the doctors, "Let me hold my baby"! they said ", no,once again". He was to ill. I said to them, well, If he's going to die anyway, what difference does it make if I hold him? The doctors were pretty adamant about me not having contact with him. I was very upset! The doctors left. I pleaded with serious tears to the charge nurse to let me hold him. I would say nothing to the doctors.
 PLEASE, He is mine! Let me hold my son or I will demand his release now!
She had tears in her own eye's. She wrapped him in a tiny blanket and handed this small frail baby to me. She said to me, "Just for a bit" O.K., I said YES! Then I held him while my tears just flowed. I held and kissed the little tender cheeks of my son. I told him how much I loved him. I asked him to hold on and be strong. I told him he was named by GOD and he should look for GOD'S help to recover. I held him up to the sky and said "LORD, if it is your will to take him home, I accept your will for us, BUT, if it is not your will, please, heal this child you gave to me! I kissed him and sang to him. I whispered how I loved him over and over in his ear.  The nurse came back in the room. She said I should put him back in the incubator. I did not want to let him go. But I reluctantly kept promise to her.
 
The next morning I was getting ready to go to the hospital. I had hardly slept. My heart was so heavy. I had HOPE however that GOD would hear my prayer. I knelt at the side of my bed and prayed with my husband that Joshua would recover.
Just as we were praying the phone rang. It was the hospital, It was the main doctor in charge. He said,
 "this is hard to say to you, I want you to know something happened here last night with your son".
His signs all took a turn for the better and through the night he has gotten better and better. Today he is like another boy, he is showing significant improvement. If this continues throughout the day, you may be able to take him home this afternoon.  He is showing all sings of a healthy newborn.
I was smiling from ear to ear. I knew GOD had heard that prayer and healed Joshua. Holding him made all the difference. I went straight away to the hospital. There were several doctors in the room with the incubator. Each one looking puzzled. But positive.
The main doctor came to me and said, I see no reason why you can't take him home now.
With that I unpacked his little white and blue knitted outfit I gotten him, gave it to the nurse. She dressed him and moved him to a little rolling acrylic bed, just like all the other babies in the ward had.
 
That evening, Joshua came home with me from the hospital.
I looked back again at that huge institution, I saw the emergency room lights as I did once before. I wondered why this odd circle of life and peril continued in the world. 
I saw the nurse that let me hold my son. We briefly made eye contact. She looked away, but had a smile on her face as she nodded and walked on.
I kissed my boy and got in the car. We drove home singing to Joshua and kissing him all over his tiny face.  
The LORD gives and takes away.
Today HE gave.

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