A Life of Blessings and MIRACLES!

 

So,I was just 16 years old.

I had met a new group of friends who went to another school in town and they were a bit different to say the least. They had a different way of looking at things than I did. They had a rebellious side to them that showed, but they seemed O.K. I knew I should steer clear of them, but they also seemed nice. I started to hang around with them every now and then and I found that they were pretty much like everyone else, the only difference was, was they were more vocal about what they believed. Different. They stayed out longer and talked a little to rough perhaps. But they became friends none the less and I guess I had to respect them in a way.

What can I say, I was young and an extremely shy introvert. They all seemed edgy, like at that time I thought I might want to be.

After being around these friends I ended up seeing some things that I didn't like much however as well.  I felt I had my own path to follow. I was making more of an effort for my future than most of them were. It was time for me to move on.

I decided to stop hanging around with them. 

 

But not before I ended up being impregnated from hanging around one of these  controlling, ruff young men. I broke off my friendship with him a bit to late.

 It was horrible for me how it all happened.

Life had just taught me a very sad lesson.  

 

I immediately changed to a new group of friends at my own school.

The old adage "Bad friends corrupt good morals" is TRUE!

I found this out the hard way.

So, here I was pregnant from the bad choices I had made. 

My Mom had me enroll in a certain home called Florence Crittendon to stay there until my child was born. I lived there 24/7 and went to their private school for seven months.

My daughter was born right after I turned 17.

I grew up really fast.

 

The terms of the unwed mothers home I was in, was that they would put your child up for adoption in exchange for covering your hospital delivery and schooling finances while you were there.  So my Mom made all these provisions, without my awareness of this.

I had no idea that these terms had been made behind my back.

My Mother was very upset with me and did not visit me while I was there.

I was young, there was a lot of things I didn't understand.

After my daughter was born, she was taken from me and adopted out to a family in Florida. The money for her adoption paid for my hospital delivery and private schooling. I had no idea where she was adopted out to or what her new name was. 

I always wondered about her. This had all been so strange.

There were many sleepless nights and troubled days that followed.

 

For 26 years I worked hard on  trying to find her. I often went back to the place where the adoption took place, but they would always ask me to pay them $75.00 dollars for any information they might have. Then they would come back with the same answer over and over again for years, "We have no new information for you".

 I would inquire almost every year.  Every year I would pay them, and I heard the same thing, we have no new information concerning your daughter. I would leave my phone number and my address again and again and again over the years.

 

About five years had past. One afternoon I was flipping through a magazine and I saw a picture in the magazine of an adorable little girl standing looking out a window eating a spoonful of peanut butter as the rain slid down the window while she peered out.

Something gripped me!

Lord I feel as if this is her!

It's just my imagination I told myself!

I starred at that picture for over an hour. It looked a little bit like me when I was young. I wondered if it was my daughter?  Could it possibly be? That would be an amazing coincidence if it was. Something about that picture caused me to connect with it! I wondered if she was even still alive? Was she O.K.? Did she live in Florida? What were her parents like?  Where is she? These thoughts and many more would just haunt me.

It was all so sad. I never wanted to be alone without her, and yet, here I was. All alone.

 Looking at the picture in the magazine I laughed and said, yeah, right, that would be impossible. It can't be her. It's just my imagination. But I wish I just knew if she was O.K.!

I ripped the picture out of my magazine, and kept it in my Bible for the longest time. I would pull the picture out over the next few years as I would pray for her, over and over again. I would pray for my daughter and hope she was in good hands!  I know it seemed silly. But I did it none the less it was a discernment I was having when I looked at that picture. It truly gripped me!

 

Twenty six years after my daughter was born I still had not been able to find her, it was now 1996.

One day as I was sitting at my desk at work, I heard a strong audible  male  voice say to me,

"Teri, go to the orphanage, inquire about your daughter, Now"!

When he said NOW it was very strong and commanding.

I stood right up and went into my boss and said, "excuse me, there is something I have to do right away. I'll be back in a few minutes". He looked up at me and said O.K., he didn't question me at all,  and with that I went to the  parking lot, got in my car and drove quickly to the orphanage. Again I inquired about my daughter. To my shock and surprise the same now very old woman behind the desk, the same woman I had spoken to many, many times before, got up and walked over to a file and came over to me and requested I pay her yet again, the $75.00 dollars. Once I paid her, she handed me a phone number and a manila envelope.

 I started crying.

 

I was shaking so hard I almost fainted, I was very weak at my knees. I turned around and walked slowly to my car in utter amazement. I sat there remembering the Voice that told me to come NOW! I was so grateful and yet so amazed at this. I opened the information in my car and read the letters in the manila envelope.

I read it over and over again.

I had found her! Thank you GOD! I had found her! Finally after searching for 26 years.

The voice that came to me spoke the truth!

I was in possession of her phone number and address. Just like that!

Just as he suggested!

It felt amazing, surreal, anointed!! 

 

I made the call that night. I made plans to fly out to see her.

 

When I got there to her, we spoke of so many things. We just went on and on and on. We cried, we laughed, we starred at each other. It was like looking into a mirror. She looked exactly like me in every way!

She was so beautiful to me. She spoke and acted just like me.

 

She mentioned she was a child model. She told me about all the different companies she modeled for. She mentioned a peanut butter modeling job. I almost fainted! I gasped and said Really! I then described the picture I had taken out of the magazine so many years earlier. She confirmed to me, it was in fact her! She remembered everything about that job, even though she was so young.  That was one of her favorite modeling jobs as a child she told me. I started crying. The picture I had been led to in the magazine, the picture I had kept in my Bible, was in fact, my very own daughter. It was GOD'S way of showing me that she was O.K., healthy and happy.

 

What peace I have now as I look back over my sometimes unfortunate life. I have been guided and vocally directed my entire life.

I am grateful to GOD for his kind care of me here.

I am thankful for HIS care over my children as well.

This truth is much stranger than any fiction I have ever read!

 

Animals See The Spiritual

 

So, it was 1987. I had an airplane ticket to fly to Texas to visit friends who owned a world wide ministry. Tyler Texas to be exact, a real Bible belt of the worlds largest ministries.  I was being interviewed in a round about way to come join the team and leave the heat from Florida to experience the heat and dust of Texas!

I had just gone through a very complicated divorce and I needed to make some decisions.

 

I flew out to Tyler and spent the week going through interviews and meeting new amazing people that later became some life long friends. Every day was busy and pleasantly exhausting.

I woke up the day before I was getting ready to head back home to Florida. I still didn't have any clear direction, so I took a long walk out in the peach orchard on the massive property of the Ministry.

I walked for about 15 minutes and all of a sudden I just burst into tears. I could not make  up my mind as what to do.  I had so many options before me but I was just wrung out emotionally. I had gotten the job but wasn't sure if I wanted to move.

All of a sudden, from I don't even know where was this huge, white horse. He was so big, and stood so high off the ground. I was actually petrified for a moment. I didn't realize horses could get that big! He came walking towards me slowly, kind of swaying as he walked my way. I had no idea what he was going to do. I was now crying tears of fear. I believe he could see my broken spirit. This gentle giant then put his nose right up to my hand which I had out in front of me. Mostly to protect myself, I was hoping he would stop! He put his head near my shoulder and just stopped moving. He could sense my fear, I was sure! He was offering me peace. He could understand some how. I felt it. He just stood there. We bonded somehow. If I took one step, he took one step. So now my tears switched back to my emotional tears. I looked him in the eyes and started talking to him. He made strange nose noises and I was stunned how I could feel him listening to me. His neck was too high to put my arm around so I just petted his mane and neck for the longest time. We walked and I talked. He walked me back down to the fence gate as I didn't remember how to get there.  I hated saying good bye to this amazing horse. I gave him a kiss on the nose, it was so soft. He just stood perfectly still. I then walked away looking back at him standing there.

 

Of all my wonderful memories there in Tyler, which were many, I must say, the few moments spent with that horse has revisited my mind many times over the years with warm thoughts.

I know he understood my broken spirit and was there to

encourage me.
When I mentioned to my friends, how this wonderful horse met me in the Orchard, they all said "Yes", he has a sweet, loving spirit that animal. He could comfort like no other, They all had experienced the strong, sensitive presence of that amazing horse.

The Voice of GOD

It was 1976, I was at church in Clearwater, FL.  I was sitting in a large room with about 85 people. I was up against the wall in the third row back. The chairs were all in a semicircle. We had a visiting preacher in town. He was a very kind man. Sincere and very focused on his sermon.

Everyone was enjoying the scripture verses he was sharing. It was a much needed message for guiding us through life in difficult times.

I was just another person in the crowd listening to what the preacher was saying.

And then everything changed.

 

As I was sitting in my chair looking forward and listening, I heard a strong, comforting, kind voice in my left ear whisper loudly, "stand and share this scripture, Now! Then he spoke the scripture in my ear as well".

I looked behind me and there was no one there. I thought perhaps it was someone in the row behind me who spoke this in my ear.

 My heart was racing. I just heard an audible voice and there is

"NO ONE THERE"!

I thought, who said that? I looked to my left, it was a beige brick wall! I looked at the woman sitting next to me on my right and said, did you hear that? She looked at me as if to hush me, as she was focused on the preacher. She didn't answer me. How could someone speak into my left ear? I was sitting up against the wall!

I shook my head and said to myself, turn to that scripture. As I flipped the pages of my bible to the requested scripture, something made me stand up! Literally stand right up! Right in the middle of this man's message. I was so embarrassed. I was shaking a bit. I heard the voice again say, READ the scripture. But this time it was more in my head than audible.

I just started reading the scripture out loud. The man stopped speaking. I obviously interrupted him. He stood with a peculiar smile on his face as he watched me reading.

After I read the scripture out loud for all to hear, something amazing happened.

He asked me why I read that scripture? I said "I have no idea sir, The voice from the wall whispered in my ear and told me to read this so I did"! The mans smile grew on his face. He looked down at the floor and said softly, I have been struggling all week with this message. I had wanted to share what you just read.

That very scripture.

I decided to read what I was reading. I struggled thinking what I chose was what I should read instead. But GOD obviously wanted me to share what you just read to us all.

He said you don't know me. You had no way of knowing this. ONLY GOD

knew what was truly in my heart. And now,

the HOLY SPIRIT

has moved you to share this for my benefit.

He thanked me for being faithful.

 

I sat down in utter amazement of what had just happened. I kept rethinking this, WHY did GOD choose me? Why not a well versed leader of the church or someone in authority? I was blessed but shocked as well.

The understanding came to me at that moment,  GOD will choose those who are willing.  Regardless of the outcome we have to walk in Faith.

What I took away from this experience was that GOD will use us if we are open to HIS SPIRIT. I pray I never change. I pray HE uses me  for HIS glory until my time on earth is finished.

 



A Haunting Introduction

It was the winter of 1972.  It was cold and damp in Florida.

The only thing warming my spirit that day was a party I was looking forward to that evening with my husband. It was boasted  to be a "real happening". We were planning on music and good food and drinks with a bunch of new friends. Just hanging out and making the scene! Our friend Dean had invited us and it all sounded like so much fun from his invitation.

I had gotten dressed early that evening as I was looking forward to the night out and the expectations of  the evening. I thought as I got dressed, "I love this new shirt and jeans I was wearing" it really is just perfect! My long blonde hair was not frizzy for a change from the muggy weather we normally have, tonight it looked terrific, I was so pleased with the way I looked. I was feeling good and in a great mood.  

 

I remember pulling up to the home where the party was and thinking how much fun this night would be. I could hardly wait to get inside. Once we were inside there were smiling happy people standing around everywhere. The typical Flower children of the 70's. I was introduced to at least 15 people as we made our way through the home to the back yard. Just as I was heading out towards the back door I passed a "Florida Room" to my right.
(Here in Florida we have this name designated for small porch like rooms that are inside the house with windows on at
least three walls of the room")
There was just a couple of people standing around in that room. I didn't know any of them. But I stopped and looked in to wave hello to all inside. As I did this, I noticed a young man sitting playing cards in the room on a card table. He looked up and smiled at me. He was a pleasant enough person. He introduced himself as Ron. He said he was just home from his tour in Vietnam. He said it was  great to be home and even greater to be at this party.  He said it was nice to meet me. I said it's great meeting you too Ron. I'm glad your home from the war! Then I said hi to the others and started to turn to leave the room and head out back where my husband was with his friend Dean.

Just then I heard this new friend Ron say to me, "hey, there's something different about you"! I said excuse me, as I smiled and looked at him, are you talking to me?  He replied, "yes, I am". I said, really? How so? He said with a smile and an odd gleam in his eye, "Oh yes, there's something very different about you, I can see it in your eyes, it's all over you, you're special". I laughed nervously and said, gee, thanks Ron. Then his demeanor changed a bit and he said, as he yelled out, "I mean it, don't laugh, you're different from everyone here"! There really is something very special about you! I smiled yet again and said, O.K., thank you Ron, if you say so. What was I to think. This was certainly bizarre to say the least!
 

Then what happened next shocked me, it took me by surprise to say the least! Ron then changed his demeanor and slammed his fist down hard on the card table and his drink and all the cards flew up and the drink spilled as he screamed and pointed to me with the other hand, he said,

"IF I DIE TOMORROW, JESUS CHRIST IS LORD"!

I responded, after I caught my breath, "O.K. man, calm down" then he did it again a second time he slammed his fist down hard on the card table and repeated,

"IF I DIE TOMORROW, JESUS CHRIST IS LORD"!

I said O.K. O.K. I got it. Then he repeated his statement to me that I was special and I had a special calling, I was different.
As he said this again he smiled and nodded over and over with a look of satisfaction in his eyes. I could see he was convinced that I was special. It made no sense to me. But somehow as I looked into his eyes, I felt he was trying to reach me, open my eye's. It was really an odd feeling.

I tried to remain in control and not run out of the house saying something I might later regret. This guy had really freaked me out. Who acts like that when you first meet someone I thought to myself? He must be some special kind of nut?

Why was he saying this to me of all people?  What angered him as I took his prophetic canting lightly? I was a bit afraid of what else he might say, I was so embarrassed, so I thanked him for his kind words to me, said it was nice to meet you, and walked out the back door to the food table where I was reunited with my husband and Dean. They had both heard what Ron had said but laughed it off.  I stood outside thinking to myself, "well, I didn't expect something like that to happen! I was thinking I'll probably be the talk of the party and never live this down! I felt uncomfortable and all of a sudden my desire to hang out and mingle changed.
I told my husband I just wanted to leave.

So we said our goodbyes quickly and headed back into the house and through the maze towards the front door. I passed by the Florida Room again and there sitting quietly was Ron at his card table. He looked at me again and said, don't forget what I said to you  as he pointed at me again, because there is definitely something very special about you.

With that, I told Ron it was very nice to meet him and to have a great night.

I headed for the door and out to the car. As we left I couldn't help but think about the strange sequence of events that had just taken place. I had wanted to be at the party so bad and here we were driving away.

A few days later our friend Dean called to speak with my husband, he said he wanted to tell him about one of his friends who had just died in a horrible car accident. Dean said he was real upset. This was a life long good friend of his who had passed.

I gave the phone to my husband and he said after he hung up, we should go to the funeral to support Dean. He's really choked up about his friend passing away. I said really? I'm sorry to hear that. He said yeah, it was that guy we met at the party the other night. I said which guy? He said Ron. Dean's good friend Ron. He was the guy in the Florida room.

My heart jumped when I heard this. I said, Oh my Gosh! He is the one who said to me,

"IF I DIE TOMORROW, JESUS CHRIST IS LORD" .

I asked my husband how Ron died? He said Dean told him he was on his way to Georgia to pick up his fiancé from Bible College as they were to get married that next week, when a drunk driver hit him head on and killed him. I was deeply moved to hear this. I said ,Yes, we will go to the funeral to support Dean.
 

I had met Ron for only a powerful odd moment in time and now he was gone. His strong words burned into my mind and heart.
He had in fact passed away the next day! This was more than strange. It was a prophetic utterance he had made to me. And was it for my benefit?
We did attend the funeral for Ron, and as I approached the casket I was hesitant and yet filled with peace. Here lay a young man who spoke out for my benefit. A bold man who did not care what others thought as he made his proclamation to me that night. I felt as if I had known him my whole life. One thing I knew then, this day would change all my tomorrows.
To this day I place flowers on his grave and say prayers at his grave site.
Thank you Ron for helping me to see what I could not see.

And yes Ron,
JESUS CHRIST IS LORD!

 



The Unwanted Presence

It was the spring of 1993. I was at home and sitting  in my bedroom on my bed reading. The day was spent and night was falling. The sun was setting and the room had that wonderful warm evening glow coming in from the windows.  My favorite time of day. There was a dim light from my bedside table providing just enough extra light for reading. I was deep into one of the last pages before I was going to quit for the night. When all of a sudden  I saw something move to my left near the bedroom door.

I looked up to see something that was almost unbelievable to me. Standing there in my bedroom doorway was my Mothers Mom,
  my Grandmother! 
That was such a shock to see I can tell you. She had been dead for a few years at that point. How could she just appear here in my doorway? And why? She was just standing there. Not smiling really, just looking at me reading on the bed. It was an odd glare.

 

I wanted to smile and welcome her, that was my first notion, but then I thought to myself, NO way!

It came to my thoughts that while she was alive she had caused so many uncomfortable scenarios for my Mother and myself. She was always a harsh woman towards my Mom. I never heard my Mom share loving memories of my Grandmother. It seemed as if whenever my Mom needed her she was never there for her. She had been less than loving towards me as well for most of my life.

I figured my Grandmother must have had a rough time of things herself, but I could never understand her being course with me about it. I did not contribute to her life issues, why treat me so cold?  She had treated my Mother horribly while my Mom was young. My Mother often shared with me sad stories about feeling lonely and un loved by her Mother. She had many bad experiences at home with siblings and her Mother would chastise her and not the others. Her memories were always so sad. It broke my heart to hear those stories. Yet my Grandmother was so kind to her other daughters and their siblings. It was a painful undertow at every meeting with her throughout my life.

 

So as I saw her standing there the first words out of my mouth were NO! Oh NO!

You don't come to me like this I thought! Why are you here I screamed out at her? Are you here to ask for my apologies, for the misery you spread around? To say how sorry you are for the way you treated my Mother in this life? NO, I screamed!
I looked at her standing there as I was literally yelling at this ghost in my doorway!

I continued yelling, "Your choices here are done, they are OVER"!

I don't want to discuss any repentance with you now!

Shame on you for hurting everyone. Shame on you for causing so much sadness!
I sat straight up and threw my arm out and pointed at her and said loudly

GO, GO NOW, go away from me. DON'T return here!
 

I watched my Grandmother standing there dressed like she always had the whole time in human form while I was yelling all this anger towards her from my heart. She was wearing a dress I had seen her in while she was alive. She didn't have her glasses on, but she was a bit overweight still and old looking. Her skin hung on her face as it did before she passed at 96 years old. She wasn't at all what I would have thought someone from the other side would look like. She looked lonely, sad, and distressed.
She was looking down at the floor now, she would not make eye contact with me once I yelled to go away.

She was very certain I was so angry with her!
 

All the hurt, all the loneliness she caused, all the agony she spread, the unapproved glances she gave and the distance she kept from those who loved and needed her, was not O.K. with me.

The worst of it was that she would always throw her cheek up and over to the left for us to kiss as we would come to visit her as if to say, come kiss me and then go sit down and shut up! She didn't smile, she wasn't warm and I never liked her judgmental stares. Who would? She never drew me out or asked me questions. There was no love, no concern shown towards any of us children. She never included me in any of her conversations. It was clearly as if I didn't even exist and she always made my Mom feel so uncomfortable.

How dare her come here now, interrupt me reading my good book and ask what of me?
I just wanted her out of my house!
 

The truth is I had no idea why she came and I wasn't about to let her tell me. I knew deep down in my heart this time was NOT the right time to make any amends with me. It was not a proper time. But when is? I just wanted to unleash all that at her to let her know what I felt for a change. I never had the opportunity to tell her while she was alive. I was always so kind and loving towards her. I respected her because my Mother told me too. But these were my terms now. I wasn't ready to hear what she had to say.

 

Her apparition began backing out of the room slowly as she continued to look straight down at the floor. She did not look at me again, and after a few moments, she simply faded away right before my very eyes! That was a bit freaky. But I was glad she was finally gone.

 

I got right on the phone and called my Mother! I told her Grandma was just here, (imagine her shock hearing that)! She gasped as I told her. I told her everything that had just happened. I told her how I shouted at her and shamed her. I could hear my Mom crying through the phone. I said, Mom are you crying? Why are you crying? I didn't let her say anything more to hurt you or I! I let her know what a witch she had been in this life time. I threw her out of here! Just like she always shut you and I out. 
 My Mother then spoke very softly through her tears and said, "Teri, why didn't you just at least let her tell you what she was there for"?
 

I got real quite, I started searching my soul for that answer. I didn't have one.  I was so preoccupied with my own pain and anger towards my grandmother.  I didn't  consider why this woman had come to me in the first place. Where had she come from? How did she get here? I never even considered asking here that.

Call me crazy, but it just seemed like the right thing to do at that moment. After all, how am I suppose to know how to act when the unexpected happens? Where's the rule book? I could clearly see what my Mom was trying to relay to me. Kindness should have come first. It was my first thought, briefly. But I was not able to be in a kind place at that moment. I had hoped my Mom would have been proud of me and understood. She did say so, as to comfort me, It's O.K. Teri, you did what you had to do, perhaps she will come again later in life? Now she knows how she hurt you first hand. Maybe she will have some growing to do herself, wherever she is?
 

It's been many years since my Grandmother dropped in to see me. I think I'd finally be ready to address her. The jury could still be out on that, but I think I am ready.

Isn't it odd this life? What with the spiritual always knocking at your door and then just the normal daily routines of life mixing in, we never know what is just around the corner.

We truly are spiritual beings on a human journey!
Walking each other home.



Voice From The Grave

A few years ago I lost the best neighbor I ever had.

When I first moved into my new home my husband and I would marvel seeing this older woman fixing things on her roof next door through our kitchen window. We would be starring at her in amazement. She was 70 years old and fearless. She always wore these funny black boots, that had to be 20 years old. Her legs were so thin and the boots were loose around her legs. My husband said one day as we were watching her climb a ladder, "looks like boots on a chicken" and we both laughed and laughed. I laughed watching her thinking how brave and determined she was.

I ran out side one afternoon and yelled at her "Dotty, get off that roof before you fall and break your neck" and she yelled back, "No way, I've got to seal a leak up here". I said, "Hire a darn roofer"! She responded, "why, I can do what any roofer will do for free"!

  It was just who she was, if something had to be done, she was going to do it herself. I just fell in love with this sweet, funny old lady.

One afternoon while talking over the back yard fence with her  which we did frequently, she confided in me that she was glad to be able to do all she did around the house and yard because when she was younger she had a frightening brush with cancer, but she was in remission from it for many years now. 

Through the years she would amaze me as she wore her little boots in her garden and would drag her water hose around the yard watering her Azalea bushes. They were the most beautiful full vibrant Azaleas. She just always made me smile when I would see her. She had a great attitude and was so kind and thoughtful towards me.

Her yearly ritual of going up on the roof in her little black boots never stopped as the years wore on, and in her late 80's she never thought twice about heading up that ladder.  She really appreciated every day and all that it brought her way! 

 

It was in her late 80's that she shared with me that her cancer was back and she was feeling pretty bad. I missed seeing her out my kitchen window dragging her watering hose around and seeing her on the roof. I missed hearing her shout at me over the back yard fence.

Hospice came to her home one day and set up a bed in her living room and nurses were there everyday to attend to her.

I walked over to visit her and as I opened her front door, there near the closet were her boots.

I glanced over to the bed she was lying on and felt so sad as I knew her days were numbered, I could feel it. I walked over to hold her hand and chat a bit. She heard my voice and smiled. She said she was sorry she couldn't get her Azaleas watered. She only spoke a little. It was all so sad.

Two day's later she passed away.

 

A month had passed maybe two. I was in my bedroom, it was around 9:00 a.m. I was making the bed and I heard her familiar voice call to me from the living room. I missed her voice, I knew immediately it was her. I stopped what I was doing and listened again, YES, it was her, she had called my name twice now. I ran down the hall towards the living room, and I yelled "Dotty, Dotty where are you"?

 

It was just me in the room and the silence. But I knew she had come. She wanted to say goodbye. I just stood in the room and waited to hear her voice again. But I didn't. I wondered how it was possible to cross into this life again? How could this sweet woman call my name and then just be gone? I wondered if I had done something to end the connection, but what?

All I know is I was grateful to hear her happy voice one more time. So strong and full of life!

This life is so strange. Nothing is as it seems.

Albert Einstein once said:

"Energy is never lost, only transferred to another form of energy"

I know that is true and I am so grateful I got to experience it first hand.



Shadow In The Storm

So, one night in 1987 I was sitting home reading a good book, which I usually read at night to help make myself feel sleepy. I began to hear the rain start pounding down on my roof. I thought to myself, sheeesh, where did that come from all of a sudden. I don't remember hearing anything about a serious storm coming tonight. The pounding grew louder and louder and it really got me concerned. Nothing was mentioned on the news about a severe storm, but this wind sounded suspicious.

I had put the kids to bed earlier and was hoping to hit the hay early myself. I decided to check the doors before I went to bed to make sure they were locked and bolted. So I  got up and went to the kitchen, I checked the back door, it was dead bolt locked, so then I walked to the front door and l checked that lock, it was also locked. I had just turned out the last light in the den as I headed back into the bedroom. The rain was still just pounding the roof and the wind was blowing so loud I wondered if the lawn equipment was going to be O.K. An uneasy feeling came over me. I got back up and checked the windows to make sure they were closed tight. The lightening was cracking and it seemed really close. I went back into the den to recheck yet again.

I had an odd feeling about the severity of this storm!

 

It was then as I was standing in the den after shutting off the last light for the night that I heard the wind literally pushing at my back door. It was rushing at it so hard I thought perhaps it was going to blow it wide open. But I said to myself, well, that's impossible, it has a dead bolt on it! I stood there listening to the wind and rain with serious concerns. I checked on the kids one last time and thought I'll just go stand in the kitchen for a moment as this wind is really acting up, it seems worse than I have ever heard it before. I was alone standing in the dark kitchen barefoot and in my night gown. I just felt as if I had to be in the kitchen for some strange and unknown reason. I was to unsettled to go to sleep. I was now literally starring at the back door standing in the dark kitchen. It was moving back and forth from the wind like I had never seen before and I must say I got a bit frightened. That had never happened before and I had been through 12 years of hurricanes and tropical storms in that house and nothing like this had ever happened. It was as if the door were going to come off the hinges. Back and forth it was moving before my very eyes as I stood there!  I felt like I was about to encounter something very strange. I could not shake the feeling.

I didn't know if it would be spiritual or what, but I was mustering up all my strength standing there in my nightgown!

 

I had always heard that if a tornado comes you can hear it first. I have heard it sounds like a freight train barreling down on you. But I could only hear the wind and the rain. And I started feeling more and more odd.

 

What happened next was so bizarre and scary I'm surprised I was not hurt.

All of a sudden as I stood there two feet from looking at the back door, it blew wide open!

The rain and wind were coming in so hard It threw me to the floor! I slipped as I became soaked by the water on the tile floor, but what was worse than all that was that in my alley as I looked out past the rain, I could see a tall man standing there looking right at me. The street light from the alley made it clear to see him with the wind and rain and lightening crashing all around. I could not see his face, but I could clearly see a man. He was wearing a cowboy hat. His silhouette was frightening standing there. He didn't move, he didn't come closer, he just stood there as if it was him blowing at the back door. I was laying on the floor when I saw him in the street light in the alley and the hair stood right up on my body. I knew I had to close the door and lock it again immediately!  I felt like I was fighting a demonic spirit! I was afraid the man would try to get in. The tile floor was so wet and slippery I could not get my footing to stand up and the wind and rain were coming in so hard I had to fight really hard to get up, I just kept slipping back down on my knees.  I wedged my right foot at the corner near the bathroom and the back door and pulled myself up the wall. I got the door and tried to close it but it would NOT close to my amazement, I tried several times pushing against the force of the wind but I could not get the dead bolt to close! I couldn't believe it, it just would not catch. The wind kept pushing it open again! How is that possible, I thought, so I pushed it closed once more and again the same thing happened. I started crying, this was just to much! I was so frustrated, how could a dead bolt not bolt the door? It simply slid out like it was broken! The man was still standing there. I was desperate to close the door! I was getting very nervous that he was going to come into the house. It was at that moment,  just as I thought that thought, when he actually started walking up the back driveway slowly and I was in a panic to close the door! My heart was pounding out of my chest! I pushed the door closed one more time and I started praying in the spirit and asking GOD to please help me! I kept slipping on the tile floor every time I tried to use force to close the door!  How I finally got the door closed I will never know. I know it was a miracle because the wind never let up for a moment! The wind was pushing against the door as I was trying to close it with each try. I got close to closing it three times but it would not stay closed. It was as if the man in the alley staring at me was fighting me to keep the door open. After the third try I got the door closed and I bolted it again!

 "FINALLY"

It worked! I had no faith in that bolt however so I also chained the door closed as well with the little chain lock on the door and the doorknob lock as well!  I was so grateful for that chain. The man was in my back driveway now and I was so scared. I was soaked and cold and so afraid. So I kept the lights off as I didn't want him to be able to see in. I pulled the curtains closed tight at the back window. It was all I could do.

Then I rebuked the enemy that fought me, I didn't know if it was the wind or the will of the man in the alley, but I prayed hard against whatever it was. I was so grateful for the victory!  

I dried myself off and sat in my bedroom shaking. I sat quietly in the dark listening to every sound. It seemed as the rain had slowed considerably now. I looked back outside after a few minutes and didn't see the man standing there any longer. Needless to say I wasn't tired anymore. I thought about calling the police but I didn't see the man out back any longer, what were they going do? What could they do?

 

To this day I don't think what blew that door open was the wind. I think that man opened the door somehow and I could feel the oddness of it all which is why I stood there staring at the door in the first place. I was right there when the door opened and stood my ground fighting to close the door again. I don't think the man was expecting that!

Today I'm grateful that nothing worse happened, but I will never forget that night. Not ever!

And I thank GOD for divine intervention and wisdom as HE protected me from that possible attack.

What doesn't kill you DOES make you stronger!

 

 

The Floating Head, Part 3

Well the weather could not have been worse that year. December 1970. I'm stuck in New York, my ship home was not going to sail!  My Mother tells me on the phone, you are on your own young lady! (You see, she never was thrilled that I wanted to go to New York in the first place). She wasn't going to help me with a ticket to get back home. I knew that meant I was staying in the frozen north until I could get the money for a ticket myself.

I don't know why my Mom was so hard on me, It sure was going to change my life to be left in Buffalo! If I had only known then what I know now!

 

This presented a conundrum for me. No where to live, no job and I was getting a little hungry. I asked my new found friend who resembled the floating head from my Florida apparition, if I could stay at his mothers home in Blasdell, as he had mentioned that could be a possibility if things didn't go well with my Mothers phone call. It was looking like just about all I could do. I ended up staying with his Mother for 2 months along with all his siblings as well. It was getting crowded fast. I called this friend by his name but I won't share that name here.  Now, there was no fear whatsoever being around him. He seemed normal, just like any other friend I had ever had. Our friendship turned into a relationship after 3 months, and we got an apartment together.  I was singing for various groups in the Buffalo and Tonawanda areas. I was doing very well. I had done so well in fact I got a call one night from a man who said he had seen me at Hearthstone manor where I sang for a very large group (500) one night and he said, Lena Horn is very sick with a sore throat and can't sing or  make her show tonight, will you sit in for her. I was so blown away, I accepted the job and had a wonderful night singing with a full orchestra. My singing career was doing very well.

I can't say that about my living conditions however.

 

In the apartment my friend and I shared things were starting to get strange.  Very strange!

I kept thinking I was seeing something out of the corner of my eye all the time. It was unnerving. I would hear strange footsteps on the stairs leading into the flat we were renting. I would hear someone talking, but I was the only one home.

One night I came home from work rather late after a night of singing my heart out and I fell asleep immediately. I had a strange and terrifying dream of an old man named "Joe" who previously lived in the apartment we were renting. He was upset that we were there and wanted us to leave he told me. I woke up and saw a shadow hovering over me in the room and screamed out load. My roommate said what happened? I told him about the dream. He laughed it off and went back to bed. The next morning while I was cooking breakfast my roommate was taking a shower. When he was done showering he came to the breakfast table and I ran into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I noticed the mirror had a name written on it, and I was very upset with my roommate as I  confronted him at the breakfast table, "very funny", you had to make fun of me didn't you? He said with a very honest look on his face, "what are you talking about"?  I said, "the name on the mirror in the bathroom". He pushed his chair back and went into the bathroom and he was actually shocked as he saw written in the steam from his shower, the name "Joe". He went white as he saw it and said, I did not put that there. I would not do something like that. I knew you were upset about your dream last night. I promise you I did not write that there!

It was then that I told him for the first time about the floating head and the resemblance to him that it had. I told him how weird things had gotten. He didn't seem to think it could have been him. (I was sure that it was him). But what do you do with something like that?

And now terrifying dreams and voices and sounds?

 

A week later we came home and noticed the rocking chair in the front room was rocking at a steady pace. We both were a bit spooked by that, but tried not to think about it. It had been happening from time to time.  I kept trying to figure it out! I was feeling more and more unhappy being in the flat. But what happened next made me very sure Joe was haunting this apartment.

I had a neighbor who had a young red haired daughter named Shannon, about 7 years old who always smiled at me when I would come and go from the flat.

She always wanted to come up to the apartment and hang out with me. I was actually happy to have her company from time to time.

One day as Shannon was sitting enjoying a cookie at my kitchen table with me she said, "who is the man who lives here with you both"? I said, "What"? She said, she had come over the other day because she thought I was home and said she saw a an old man sitting in the rocker through the keyhole in the front door, she was peeping in. I really got upset and asked her to describe the man, and she did. I didn't let on that I was freaked out by her. She said she has seen him more than once here. I was speechless. I was also terrified! I didn't know how to respond to that, I didn't want to scare her, but I was scared out of my own wits! So I got up from the table and we both left the apartment immediately. I waited outside downstairs all day at the laundry mat until my roomy came home. I explained what the neighbor girl had shared with me. We were both very apprehensive about staying in the apartment much longer. We decided we'd get another flat to rent as soon as we could. This meant breaking the lease and loosing our deposit.

 

I didn't like being alone in the flat for any length of time so I had  Shannon come over more often during the day while my roomy was at work.

Shannon told me this one day as she was looking at my  Florida drivers license laying on the table that she could see my picture starting to move. She went on to say, she saw me in a white car with a young man with shoulder length brown hair, she said  I was driving the car, she told me this as she was starring at my license!

 That was extremely freaky!

She said she could see something dangling from the rearview mirror in this white car. It looked like it was a basket. I absolutely was frightened beyond belief at this point. She was describing my previous boyfriend, and my car, and it's color, as well as the basket woven talisman I had hanging from the rear view mirror.

How could she know that?

The spirit of Joe had possessed this kid and she was speaking to me of things she could not have possibly known!

Here is a little girl sitting in my kitchen telling me she could see all this from looking at my drivers license? The hair was standing up all over my body. I wanted to scream but I didn't know what to scream! Her face was so innocent looking. Her long red hair and big blue eyes, her milky white skin! And she sees all this?

HOW?

It creeped me out! It was so unreal. I asked her to stop. She acted as if nothing was out of order. Again I waited all day  downstairs at the laundry mat until my roommate came home. That was it !

 I wasn't going back into that flat again except to get my things to move! And no more visits from that sweet possessed child!

I found out from another neighbor after asking around about the apartments tenants, that there was an older man who lived in our  flat several years earlier. She said he was a very nice man that kept to himself. He was often seen sitting by the front window in his rocking chair there most of the day. He had in fact died in the apartment and his name was "Joe". The woman said that she felt he died of a broken heart as his wife had passed a few years earlier as well and he lived in the apartment alone.

There is so much we don't understand about this life. I will always look back at this experience as an opportunity to open my mind and accept there is so much more to us as humans than we actually understand. I understand it all now, but back then I was living through the fear of it all.

I am sure that the floating head relationship was NOT for me to indulge in. I made wrong choices and bad judgements living on my own back then at such a young age. Wiser now, I will share that when we are guided away from something, take note of that!

Don't go there! There's a very good reason for it.

Sometimes as with me, it's just not going to go well for you.

And never forget, truth is always stranger than any written fiction!

The Floating Head, Part 2

 

So, after about three months had passed since my experience at the St. Petersburg beach apartment I found myself one night in Tampa watching a live group from Miami who happened to be passing through while on their way to Buffalo, New York. 

I had been staying with friends as not to return to my Moms place and that was getting very stressful for me. Living with friends was not working well for me. 

The Group was looking for a female vocalist. I mentioned I sang. They asked me if I wanted to interview for the job. 

 I was honored. I showed up the next day per the invitation and was so surprised when I found out that of all the singers that had tried out for the position, they had chosen me for the job.

I was elated!

They were leaving in a week after a brief unexpected trek back to Miami and would pick me up along the way to New York, that is if I wanted to take the job with them. I said,  "I'd love the opportunity and the experience" I had never been to New York,

I had heard it was pretty cold. But I decided to go along anyway for the experience of it all.

 

So after the week went by, I was on my way to sing in New York for the first time ever with my new band. "The High Street Carnival".. I had never sung with a group like this before. I was simply star struck. I couldn't wait for those bright lights! I had great expectations.

I had never been to New York and didn't realize how cold 20 degrees actually was!

After singing in New York for 4 weeks with the group and bearing the incredibly cold rehearsals and gigs, I decided it was just to cold for me in New York and I really wanted to head to the warmer climate of Florida and I was home sick. I was given options with the band and I didn't like any of them, so I took off on my own to begin my way back home.

I headed out in the evening with just my suitcase and the clothes I was wearing, which I might add were fit for southern winters, not New York blizzards. It was snowing and the wind was howling, it was so cold my ears were freezing. I was desperate to say the least at this point to get home somehow. I was trying not to cry as I knew it would do no good, but also I didn't want my face to freeze.  With only a few dollars in my pocket, nowhere to go, not being well dressed, and freezing, I had some quick decisions to make. I had to get back to Florida... I ended up stopping in a bar (Mr. Good Bar no less) in Buffalo on Elmhurst to warm my hands, ears and feet while heading down towards the bus stop. Maybe they would let me call my Mom for money on their phones? I walked into the bar and stood just inside the door and felt the immediate warmth engulf me, I so wanted to get home to Florida! I wasn't old enough to drink, so I could not go into the bar.... I glanced around the room and to my surprise I was stunned to see what I saw next.  I saw two men sitting at the bar, one of the men I was looking at who was sitting at the bar, was the face I had seen floating on my wall in my apartment in St. Petersburg beach a month or so before. I was shocked. He had the same face! I was transfixed on his face!

 I froze in fear as I looked at him sitting there. His hair was identical to what I had seen, very long and a bit stringy, he had the same eyes and his appearance was almost frightening, except his eyes were bright, bright blue. The face on the wall had dark shifty eyes. But this man really looked like him, except the eyes.

Was this the same man? He had a long beard, very dark, long hair, and thick eyebrows. It really was similar to the floating head I had seen.

 

Then something strange happened. It was like he shape shifted right before my very eyes while I was standing there looking at him. He seemed very kind, attractive in a strange way, very much a gentleman. Then all of a sudden, just like that, he got up, paid his bill as I was watching him, and walked out of the bar. He walked right past me, looked me right in the eyes and smiled as he left. A very kind smile. I don't really understand why but I followed behind him after a moment or two. Right back out into the freezing cold. I walked after him in the freezing wind because I could not believe who I was seeing. This was that face that frightened me so in Florida. But it wasn't scary now at all.

This was the floating head in person!

Was this meeting meant to be?

 

As I was following him, he stopped on the corner, turned and looked directly at me and asked me with a smile on his face, very matter of fact "are you following me"?  I was stunned! I didn't know what to say,

so I simply said..."yes, I am".

Then it was like magic. He seemed to change again right before my eyes. I noticed he had a kind smile.  A trusting look about him. I felt at ease. His eyes were blue, extremely blue, and his stance was one of concern towards me. He asked me where I was going? I told him to the bus stop. He asked why? I told him I was heading home to Florida because I didn't want to stay in the freezing weather another minute. I somehow felt as if I were to meet him here. This was some sort of predestined meeting. I asked him if I could use his phone at home to call my Mother to get a bus or airline ticket back home. He said yes. You see, I only had about $6.00 dollars on me, and that wasn't going to get me home.

Thus began a 15 year friendship with one of the sweetest men I had ever met.

But it came at an incredible price.

Paranormal things began happening to me immediately at an unbelievable pace. Ghosts, dreams, moving objects, moving people in pictures, apparitions, writings on mirrors and so much more. What I didn't know was that even though this man was very sweet, I had been cautioned by the apparition of this mans floating face on my wall NOT to align myself with him, but I didn't realize it at the time. I just never put two and two together. As I look back over my life I clearly see it was a warning to me, and I missed it.

What followed was stranger than any fiction

I had ever even heard of.

My life was changing and I could not stop it.

~

To be continued

The Floating Head, Part 1

It was 1970 and I lived in an apartment on 8th Avenue on St. Petersburg beach with my Mom. We had been there about 2 months. She worked everyday and I was often there alone by myself. This was my first summer living on the beach, so I lived in my bathing suit for the most part on a daily basis. There was a faulty air conditioner that often left the apartment very warm inside.  It's always HOT in Florida in the summer. We were about 2 minutes walking distance from the water, the Gulf of Mexico. We went swimming to cool off daily. It was wonderful. But it was also very, very hot out every single day.

Our apartment was pretty small compared to some of the places on the beach, but we were happy. There were only 4 rooms in the apartment, but it really was all we needed.

  As you walked in the front door there was a large dining room and living room that were really just one separated room that led to the bedroom and to the right was a small kitchen and a very small bathroom, and there you have it. So from the bedroom you could see right out the front door. My Mom and I shared the bedroom. My bed was in view of the front door. My Mom opted for the bed to the left of the doorway for a bit more privacy.

 

On this particular day my Mom had gotten up at 6:30 a.m. to head off to work, as she usually did and left me in the apartment sound asleep. It was about 10:00 a.m. when I woke from my sleep, I felt so strange, I felt as if someone were in the room with me.  It was an eerie feeling.  As I rolled over to my great horror just to the right of the doorway was a very dark face emerging from the wall. "It was horrifying"! It came more and more into view until I could clearly see a frightening face just floating there on the wall. What an awful and orphic way to wake up seeing this! The face was that of a man and it had long black hair and a heavy beard and horrifying dark eyes. It was looking at me intently with a frightening fixed stare. I looked away a few times to see if I were imagining it. Unfortunately, I wasn't!

I kept trying to look away, and slowly put my hands to my face! I wanted to scream! How can this be happening?

It was there after I rubbed my eyes. I was frozen in fear. I looked away from it as I was so afraid. I knew I was alone in the apartment and was completely helpless. I couldn't even scream, I was so scared. I was just frozen, what the heck is that thing? I had been sleeping in my night shirt. I had no undergarments on and I knew I couldn't just get up and run outside in what I was wearing. I fought the fear as I tried not to look at this face glaring at me. It just wouldn't go away! I reached down to the floor slowly and found my jeans lying where I had left them the night before.  I thought if I can just slip these jeans on I can run out of here. Then it occurred to me I had to run past the face, which was still on the wall and it frightened me to think of what that would entail. I was trying to talk myself through the fear.  I just wanted to scream! Why wouldn't it go away? I glanced up at the head once again. It was still floating in the same place on the wall just to the right of the door and looking at me.  The eyes would move and blink, it was so horrifying. I wanted to cry! What good would that do, I thought? Just get out of the room, get out! I quickly looked away again. The fear was overtaking me. The facial hair and head hair was pure black, only a slight facial view was seen as the hair was grossly everywhere. !  I started talking to myself . "Just get your jeans on Teri, just get your jeans on! I could see my purse and car keys on the dresser, but there was no way I was going for them. He was floating right over the dresser on the wall to the right of the doorway. I didn't want to get that close to the head.  I slipped into the jeans slowly and didn't even zip them up. I stared forward and got out of bed and ran with my eyes closed past the doorway and headed for the front door at a brake neck pace. I quickly unlocked the door and ran out onto the hot sand in the parking lot which was just out of the apartment door. I stood outside in total disbelief of what I had just experienced. I was freaked out completely!

My feet were burning in the very hot sand. I had no shoes on! I just wanted to cry I was so afraid.

What the heck was that? Why did this happen to me? Where did it come from? I was shaking from the experience and there was no one to talk to. 

I knew I couldn't stand outside in this hot sand and sun for any length of time.  My feet were burning, and the 98 degrees was hitting me hard in the full sun! My purse and keys were still in the apartment so I knew I had to go back in and get them if I were to leave this place. But how? I was so scared. There was no one around so I kept the front door open and waited about a half hour or so. I went into the apartment and went straight into the bedroom to grab my sandals and purse and keys. The apparition was gone. Thank GOD! I moved very fast collecting my things.

What was that? It seemed demonic in every way.

To this day I don't know where I mustered up the nerve to go back into the apartment, but I knew I needed my money and car keys and my sandals. I was desperate to get out of there.

This ended up being the last day I would ever stay in that apartment. I drove to my Moms work and told her what had happened. She saw the fear in my face and heard the desperation in my voice. I told her I wasn't going back until she went home and then I would get my things and go stay with a friend.

My Mom stayed about 2 more weeks to the end of the month and then she also moved out.  She however had her boyfriend stay with her. I stayed with friends. No way was I going through that again.

Little did I know then that this was just the beginning of so many paranormal things to come. Very demonic attacks and strange other worldly dimensions.

 

Today I believe this was a manifested demonic entity sent to disrupt my life. And that it did!

 

We live in a strange world. But have no fear. We can overcome all the world throws at us! JESUS was my answer.

It took me about 3 more years however, before I found that truth.

It was a rough ride. He was with me even when I didn't know he was! HE was how I got out of that apartment. HE gave me the strength!

I did find out within the year who this head was....are you ready for the rest of the story.

Part 2, I'll share tomorrow.

Truth is stranger than fiction!

 



The Prophetic WAKE UP!

It was a beautiful summer morning in 1982. I was driving on my way to work as I do every weekday.

 I was praying on and off as I also usually do on long jaunts across the bridge but I always get so easily distracted, I don't know why.

This particular morning I was flying down the interstate 275 heading North towards Tampa from St. Petersburg. I was working in Tampa but lived in St. Petersburg, which is on the West side of the Howard Frankland bridge. It was always a long, grueling  bumper to bumper ride at 7:30 a.m. in the morning, and like many others I did this every morning.

 

On this particular wonderfully warm summer morning I was riding along with my radio on but turned down a bit. I wasn't thinking about anything much really that I can remember, just sort of in and out of prayerful thoughts, and just focused on the grind.

Nothing seemed unusual at all.

When all of a sudden I heard an audible male voice

SCREAM out loudly in the car, he said;

"WAKE UP!........ WAKE UP"!

Just like that, and so loud it was deafening!

It seemed to come at me from my left ear!

That was the ear up against the drivers side window!

I was shocked!

What the heck!

I almost had an accident as I jerked the wheel when I heard him scream this. It was frightening and so unexpected. It startled me and scared me beyond belief! It was so loud!

Who said that I thought? Is it going to happen again?

 

I kept driving somehow and I quickly reached over to shut the radio off and said out loud in an agitated voice, "Are you kidding me"! I am awake, I'm driving 60 miles an hour down the interstate, what do you mean WAKE UP? You can clearly see I'm awake. I'm on my way to work! Who said this?

Silence.....

There was no reply. I waited for a moment more, still no reply.

"Are you kidding me" I said, Who am I talking to here?

 

I asked again, what do you mean wake up? How can I be driving down the interstate and not be awake? HELLO! Why are you asking me this?

Still, no reply.

I was baffled, I just didn't understand. What could that mean,

wake up, Is this a spiritual question, am I suppose to know what that means???

 

Sadly to say,

It wasn't until 20 years later that I really understood what that prophetic voice was trying to tell me.

I was spiritually asleep even though I was searching. I was asleep in the light. I only understood parts of what were happening to me throughout my life. It seemed as if every week it was something more I couldn't piece together.

I was being guided to wake up from my spiritual slumber!

 I thank GOD I have lived long enough to finally figure out what was meant by the prophetic voice.

 

I'm wide awake today. The veil has been opened between this life and the next. I have eyes that see now and ears that hear. I'm learning as I walk with those in the land of the living towards home. I now truly understand.

We are not taught in churches the deep oracles of GOD, we are taught through personal asking, seeking, and knocking until we hear HIS voice! We come to understand truly once we embrace the SPIRIT of life! The HOLY SPIRIT Himself!

We are all on this journey together in this life, walking each other towards home.

I'm so very grateful to be awake.

Are you awake?